A Porcine Phenomenon

An equinox occurs every spring and autumn. The plane of the equator, passes directly thru the sun and every person in the northern and southern hemispheres has a perfect day - an equal amount of sun and darkness. There are other celestial wonders that occur only once in a lifetime, like Hally's Comet.

Sometime though, the terrestrial powers that be, wield their influence, and you have an honest to goodness "Porcine Phenomenon".

We were traveling home on 160 highway from a long, hot summer day of surveying in the "Big Woods" in western Oregon County. My brother Ralph, Rolan Norsworthy and I, had been following an empty cattle trailer, (traveling very slowly) for a few miles and had made it over "Radio City Hill", when everything started going south.

About the time we made it to the flat, past the little hill in front of the radio station, the back gate on the cattle trailer swung open... And Behold!, we discovered that the cattle trailer was not empty!

While all of us watched with utter amazement and amusement, a huge Yorkshire sow came wandering back to the now open gate! She stood at the edge of the trailer and looked down at the highway speeding past her nose at 40 miles per hour...

Hold on! There's more... While the old sow stood placidly looking out the back of the trailer, about six or seven little piglets wandered back and lined up right beside Mammy!

By this time, our driver, Rolan, had begun to flash his headlights and honk at the truck pulling the "Piggy" trailer, trying to get him to stop. And the pigs continued to be blissfully unaware of the catastrophe lurking mere inches from their snouts!

The driver of the truck finally figured out that something was amiss and pulled over at Allen street, right at the city limits. And that was where the fun began...

When the truck and trailer stopped rolling, we were right behind it to try to keep the pig and piglets IN the trailer. It worked really well... with the piglets. The old sow however? She saw the open gate for what it was... FREEDOM!!!

The very second that the trailer stopped rolling she was out and makin' tracks for Arkansas!

We piled out of our truck and were joined by the pig's owner and some other men that had stopped, in an impromptu (un-greased) Pig Scramble! Whoa Nellie! We chased her down the street, across yards, through business parking lots, all the while trying to keep her from going across the traffic on Highway 160. In a few minutes, there were enough of us to corner her and then, (if it were possible) things got even more exciting.

It was time to decide how best to get her back into the trailer. We had already seen how herding her went down. So we decided just to CARRY her back to the trailer... Remember, this is a sow and she will weigh 500-600 pounds!

We didn't want to get bit so the handiest thing at the front end was ears. So two men latched onto an ear apiece. The rear end provided three handholds... two legs and the tail. The only person I vividly remember with a hand on the pig was Ralph...he had a back leg.

Did you know that pigs squeal? Did you also know that a pig's squealer goes into overdrive when they are picked up and unceremoniously carried?

Did you also know that a pig can kick with it's back legs? The very instant the old sow went airborne, she started kicking! Not little, slow, soft kicks... But rapid fire, bone jarring, honest to goodness piggy kicks! Poor ole Ralph's teeth were chattering, his head was rattling, his arms were being jerked a-mile-a-minute and all while trying to hustle toward the back of the trailer!

When we got her to the back of the trailer, another problem arose. How do you put her in without her immediately turning around and escaping again? The little piglets had been herded behind a cross gate in the trailer so there was no danger of them escaping... So we decided a "Bacon Launch" would do just fine.

We stood at the of the trailer and did the old "One-Two-Three!" and sent old porker sailing into the trailer and quickly slammed the back gate shut!

The pig's owner thanked us, we climbed back into the truck and continued on to the office... Tired but satisfied that we had done our good deed for the day...